24 things that 2024 taught me
everything is romantic xx
Hey,
Hope you’re doing well. This post is a follow-up to my 23 things I learned in 2023 which I published last year. I hadn’t planned on doing another one until my friend Ava told me I should when we were at a party a few months back. A lot of conversations I’ve had this year—the year of Brat, my year of 26—have been at parties. It’s been a good time even though I think I badly need to catch up on sleep. Anyway, here are some things I've gotten closer to understanding this year. It’s been silly and fun.
24 things that 2024 taught me
Getting close to someone new means giving them the opportunity to hurt your feelings. It means taking the risk of saying the wrong thing, fucking up, and being vulnerable. You should do all of this anyway, even if it makes you feel like a walking raw nerve in the process.
If someone has decided to cut off a family member, whether temporarily or for good, don’t judge them for it. Children innately love their parents and think they’re the best people in the world. If they choose to make that decision, they likely have a very good reason for doing so.
Regular, repeat interactions = friendship. Repeating “we should get a pint!” every time you run into someone does not mean you’re automatically friends. You have to get the pint, or go for dinner, or check out that exhibition together. Then you have to go and do it again.
One day you will wake up and not give a shit about the stuff you used to—those things that people said about you, that friend that hurt you, the stuff you blurted out that you regret. This will happen quite suddenly. When it does, notice that feeling and let the freedom of letting go sink into your bones. Enjoy it. You deserve it.
It is nearly impossible to live in the modern world and not have issues with your body. You shouldn’t beat yourself up for this but it’s your responsibility to not slip into self-destructive habits because of it. Don’t skip meals. Scroll past the body-checking TikToks. Stop being so cruel to yourself in the changing room.
Getting enough protein is boring but important. Make some eggs for breakfast and you’ll stop feeling so fatigued and fuzzy-headed in the morning.
You spend way too much time worrying about being weird at parties.
A long walk is medicinal and the best cure for feelings of restlessness, ennui, and anxiety. All you need is a playlist, a good daydream, and a mantra that it’s all going to be fine.
In 2024 you will watch The Substance, find your first grey hair, and feel emotional when listening to these lyrics in Rewind by Charli XCX. However, you’ll be surprised to find that you actually like getting older. You feel grounded in the present in a way you didn’t before, when you were seemingly endlessly fixated on the past or the future. You’re most interested in what’s happening to you right now.
You will constantly be trying to find the perfect balance between creative work, a rich social life, staying healthy, and getting enough downtime to decompress and chill out. You will never achieve this because it’s impossible. You’ll find that you have seasons where one of these things feels a lot more important to you than the others. Instead of resisting it, try leaning in. You might just need a period of experiencing life so that you can re-fill your well to create things.
Humour is the most important tool to have in your survival kit for life. You can pretty much laugh about anything, even the things that terrify or devastate you. And laughing so much your belly hurts is one of the best feelings in the world.
If you’re feeling confused about your life and your work and your friendships, maybe you just need to rewatch Frances Ha.
You’re going to have to try and stop smoking at some point. This is unfortunate because it’s a great tonic for a weird mood and it also makes you feel cool and sexy. But you seriously will need to quit eventually. Not now, but soon.
Hanging out with your friends is magic, but if you’re unable to spend one night at home alone, you’re probably trying to distract yourself from something.
Getting a little tipsy and flirting is one of life’s simple pleasures.
Literally nothing bad will happen if you turn your phone off at 9pm and go to bed. You will probably feel better for it, actually.
Having a persistent feeling of loneliness as a child will mean that you will overthink a lot of normal aspects of friendship as an adult. You will read too much into innocuous things and be suspicious of people’s good intentions. Remind yourself that this is a self-protection mechanism. Thank your brain for this but be sure to not always listen to it.
Getting your clothes altered by a good tailor is always worth the money. You will love your t-shirts infinitely more when they fall perfectly at your hips.
Having a true sense of community is a gift, one that you’ll value even more the older you get. Being surrounded by interesting, caring, creative people can utterly change your experience of the city you live in. It takes work and time to cultivate this, but once you get it, it’s beautiful.
Having a creative passion means killing your ego, swallowing seemingly countless rejections, and sometimes doing work for free. After many years and many moments of feeling like it’s pointless, things will eventually start to fall into place. When they do, it will feel really, really good.
A good haircut is the best confidence boost. When a girl stops you on the street in London to tell you that “you have a beautiful bob” you will feel invincible.
Take photos, note down the funny things people say, notice when you feel happy and try to understand why. Time moves fast and life changes in an instant. Savour it. Don’t let yourself forget.
These two Jemima Kirke Instagram stories will perfectly define the narrative of your year. You will find yourself referring back to them on an almost weekly basis.
A philosopher of our time You will feel cracked open and happy and pathetic and hungry and crazy and hopeful. Sometimes you will feel it all in the space of a day. You will think about death more than ever and simultaneously feel the most alive you ever have. There is a lot of love surrounding you, a lot of people you care about, faces you get excited to see who were barely recognisable to you this time last year. Marvel at how special it is to grin at them across a dancefloor, gossip over pints, listen to their voice notes giving you advice, sing along to music in the car, cuddle hungover on the couch, feel their legs against yours in a bar. This is your life. You are very lucky to be living it.
Thanks for reading. Love you, bye x
Toolkit grade reflections 🫶